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Autor:  Tiago T.
E-mail:  não-disponível
Data:  12/JAN/2013 2:02 PM
Assunto:  versão part 2
 
Mensagem:  I've also attempted to make a few corrections. I tried not to change the original text too much. Here it goes:

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You are also important to the world because of your personal beliefs, as an upright citizen and for what is being expected from you in behalf your academic background.


You are also important to the world because of your personal beliefs as an upright citizen and because of your academic background, which brings us high expectations.


It's a good idea to make the sentence parallel. If the first element was introduced by "because of," try to introduce the second element likewise.


The expression "on behalf of" means "for the benefit of", so it doesn't fit very well in the sentence.


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Nevertheless, this haven’t prevent you to successfully make achievements like this one you are celebrating together with outstanding professionals and the ones you hold esteem.


Nevertheless, this hasn't prevented you from making successful achievements like the one you are celebrating with these outstanding professionals whom you hold in high esteem.


The present perfect is constructed by the verb "to have" (which should agree with the subject) and the past participle of the main verb. So it should be: "this hasn't prevented."


The expression "prevent someone from doing something" is really common. It can be considered a fixed expression, so you should stick to the traditional structure.


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Thus, to give back to society what it provided to you is a moral duty and I know you already behave like this and will continue be the generous-heart, social and political awareness person you are.


Thus, giving back to society what it has provided to you is a moral duty. I know you  already behave this way and will continue to do so with your generous heart and sociopolitical awareness.


Here, the time is not important, so you should use the present perfect instead of the simple past.


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We are built up by the others's people knowledge.


We are built up by other people's knowledge.


The possession idea is established between "other people" and "knowledge". So you should add the 's to "other people", which is the noun phrase that holds the knowledge.


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We are buit up by the people we care, by the ones we exchange habits of living, by the ones we share academic wisdom and even by disloyal ones.


We are built up by the people we care about, by the ones we exchange experience with, by the ones from whom we learn academically, and even by the ones who are disloyal to us.


Many verbs in English require a complement with a preposition. You can never omit the preposition. You don't just care, you care about someone. You don't just exchange, you exchange something with someone.


The sentences are inverted, but you shouldn't omit the preposition:


We care about the people. --> The people we care about.

We exchange experience with the people. --> The people we exchange experience with.


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Your professors, counselors, friends, girlfriends were part of this “whole”, so were you Family.


Your professors, counselors, friends and girlfriends were part of the person you are; and so was your family.


"Family" is a singular noun: "Your family was..."


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Thanks for giving us the proud of bearing the title of a doctor.


Thanks for giving us the opportunity to award you the title of Doctor.


"Proud" is an adjective: "I'm proud of you!"

"Pride" is a noun: "I'm full of pride!"


The doctor holds/bears a title. That happens because someone else awarded him this title.


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I hope that helps!


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Índice de mensagens


 English Made in Brazil -- English, Portuguese, & contrastive linguistics
versão part 2  –  Maria Madalena ( Madá)  11/JAN/2013, 11:10 AM
versão part 2  –  PPAULO  12/JAN/2013, 3:45 AM
versão part 2  –  Maria Madalena ( Madá)  12/JAN/2013, 12:20 PM
 versão part 2  –  Tiago T.  12/JAN/2013, 2:02 PM
versão part 2  –  Maria Madalena ( Madá)  12/JAN/2013, 2:39 PM
versão part 2...continued.  –  PPAULO  13/JAN/2013, 12:52 AM
versão part 2...continued.  –  PPAULO  13/JAN/2013, 1:13 AM
versão part 2...continued.  –  Maria Madalena ( Madá)  14/JAN/2013, 10:00 AM
versão part 2...continued.  –  PPAULO  14/JAN/2013, 7:22 PM

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